Little Johnny has bought a goldfish brought home, put the jar on the table and said to her, ' my three wishes of the Executive '. Fish in response to open his mouth only. Little Johnny, accepting silence as assent, he continues:.
- The first. I want to fuck Pigweed Ivan, the teacher our.
- Second. I want a new leather strap.
- Third. I want a bike.
A fish opened his mouth only. And all of a sudden call. Opens, and there Pigweed.
Ivanna. Work, Little Johnny yelled, and removes his pants. The teacher, seeing a salutation, short leather strap and allow luptsevat Vovochku. He could not understand, running around the room, dodging. Finally, he saw an open window, whitefish in it, and lands directly on someone's bike eggs. In Vovochka choked in my craw, and bulging eyes, he squeezes out:.
- Here is a silly fish. That's all messed up!.
In the first class, the teacher gives the task: to name and describe the most valuable thing that is known to students.
Petechka stood up and told her about the father's car.
Masha - about my mother's a diamond necklace.
Little Johnny stands up and says:.
- Monthly!.
The teacher already choked:.
- Little Johnny! .
Little Johnny says:.
- What is it I do not know, but I do know that it is - something very valuable, because when the morning.
My eldest sister announced that they have it gone, the mother fainted,.
his father suffered a heart attack, and our neighbor, and even took a shot.
Little Johnny is in a class with a delay of 5 minutes. The teacher:.
, Vova, where were you?.
- Potatoes roasted, Maria Ivanovna.
-? .
After another 10 minutes. The class comes to Kate. The teacher:.
- Kartoshkina, and where are you been?.
During the lesson, the teacher:.
- Children, tomorrow we will write an essay on ...
Little Johnny pulls his hand.
- Yes, Little Johnny what he wanted?.
- Maria Ivanovna, and if tomorrow I 'll be sexually overwrought?.
- Nothing, Little Johnny, you write with your other hand.
Biology teacher shows students dangers of alcohol. Take the worm, throws a glass of alcohol - the podoh.
Throws a worm in a glass of water - he lives.
- Children, what conclusion can be made from this?.
Little Johnny: - If you drink alcohol, the worms will not!.
Vovochku take into Pioneers.
- How do you study?.
- horoshist.
- Senior helping?.
- And what about.
- With whom do you live?.
Little Johnny blushed:.
- Yes there is, on the one.
The teacher asked an essay on the topic:.
' If I was the director of the company. '.
All the carefully written, and only Little Johnny looks out the window.
- And why did not you write?.
- I look forward to the secretary.
arithmetic lesson. The teacher asks a question Vovochke:.
- Just imagine, I give you $ 200. You give $ 50 Masha, Lena $ 50 and $ 50 Natasha.
What do you have to be?.
Little Johnny:.
- Orgy.
Vovochkin class went to see the statue of Venus. The next day the teacher asked who liked that.
- She has beautiful shoulders.
- She has a beautiful face.
- She has beautiful legs.
- She has beautiful breasts.
Peter:.
- She has a beautiful ass.
The teacher:.
- How could you! .
He leaves, and behind him stands up and takes Little Johnny.
The teacher:.
- Little Johnny! .
- So right now, anyway expel - there is an n. and remained.
Little Johnny asks his mother:.
- Mom, it's true that God feeds us?.
- In general, yes.
- A child brought by a stork?.
- Of course.
- A Santa Claus handing out gifts?.
- Yes.
- Then please tell me why we keep our father?.
The teacher:.
- ...
Little Johnny:.
- I doubt it.
the teacher:.
- They mean the action.
Little Johnny:.
- But how can there be action if dropped and hanging.
Maryvanna in class:.
- Little Johnny, declined the verb ' to vote '.
- I vote, you vote, he votes, its vote, we vote, you vote.
- Little Johnny, and 'they'?.
- And they - we like to shit on!.
In the family of recidivist.
- Little Johnny, if you will study well, dad steals your bike.
Yesterday Vovochka Dad went to parent-teacher meeting, and stayed the night at the.
fizichki. The next day she put a deuce Vovochke. And after that.
someone else will claim that the son 's father does not respond?.
Director of Studies:.
- Maria Ivanovna, why do you have Little Johnny says dictation is not enough that errors, so even with matyugami?.
- Well, how do you explain, Eleanor P.. The boy writes, makes mistakes, gets nervous, starts cursing, writes on.
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